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QB

Player	Team
Joe Flacco	Statistical Anomaly
Matthew Stafford	Conceit
Matt Ryan	Ohio Thunder Badgers
Nick Foles	Good on Paper
Peyton Manning	Apocalypse Horsemen
Drew Brees	(Insert Witty Name)
Ryan Tannehill	Ryan's Rad Team
Aaron Rodgers	Irsay's $29K
Tom Brady	Gallifrey Time Lords
Andrew Luck	@Coltscanada
Jay Cutler	Carolina Shoecocks
Robert Griffin III	Team BNTC

WR

Player	Team
Andre Johnson	Statistical Anomaly
Calvin Johnson	Conceit
Demaryius Thomas	Ohio Thunder Badgers
Keenan Allen	Good on Paper
Emmanuel Sanders	Apocalypse Horsemen
Jeremy Maclin	(Insert Witty Name)
Jordy Nelson	Ryan's Rad Team
A.J. Green	Irsay's $29K
Mike Wallace	Gallifrey Time Lords
Antonio Brown	@Coltscanada
Vincent Jackson	Carolina Shoecocks
Dez Bryant	Team BNTC

WR

Player	Team
Steve Smith	Statistical Anomaly
Odell Beckham Jr.	Conceit
Alshon Jeffery	Ohio Thunder Badgers
Eric Decker	Good on Paper
Charles Johnson	Apocalypse Horsemen
Josh Gordon	(Insert Witty Name)
Torrey Smith	Ryan's Rad Team
Randall Cobb	Irsay's $29K
Denard Robinson	Gallifrey Time Lords
Golden Tate	@Coltscanada
Doug Baldwin	Carolina Shoecocks
Victor Cruz	Team BNTC

RB

Player	Team
Giovani Bernard	Statistical Anomaly
Pierre Thomas	Conceit
DeMarco Murray	Ohio Thunder Badgers
Zac Stacy	Good on Paper
Mark Ingram II	Apocalypse Horsemen
Tre Mason	(Insert Witty Name)
Eddie Lacy	Ryan's Rad Team
C.J. Anderson	Irsay's $29K
LeSean McCoy	Gallifrey Time Lords
Jamaal Charles	@Coltscanada
Frank Gore	Carolina Shoecocks
Marshawn Lynch	Team BNTC

RB

Player	Team
Joique Bell	Statistical Anomaly
Terrance West	Conceit
Dan Herron	Ohio Thunder Badgers
Carlos Hyde	Good on Paper
Jonathan Stewart	Apocalypse Horsemen
Latavius Murray	(Insert Witty Name)
Alfred Morris	Ryan's Rad Team
Justin Forsett	Irsay's $29K
Le'Veon Bell	Gallifrey Time Lords
Isaiah Crowell	@Coltscanada
Arian Foster	Carolina Shoecocks
Toby Gerhart	Team BNTC

TE

Player	Team
Antonio Gates	Statistical Anomaly
Jason Witten	Conceit
Travis Kelce	Ohio Thunder Badgers
Jordan Reed	Good on Paper
Heath Miller	Apocalypse Horsemen
Martellus Bennett	(Insert Witty Name)
Rob Gronkowski	Ryan's Rad Team
Jermaine Gresham	Irsay's $29K
Charles Clay	Gallifrey Time Lords
Greg Olsen	@Coltscanada
Julius Thomas	Carolina Shoecocks
Vernon Davis	Team BNTC

W/R/T

Player	Team
Jimmy Graham	Statistical Anomaly
Jordan Matthews	Conceit
Mike Evans	Ohio Thunder Badgers
DeAndre Hopkins	Good on Paper
Pierre Garcon	Apocalypse Horsemen
Kelvin Benjamin	(Insert Witty Name)
Fred Jackson	Ryan's Rad Team
Brandon LaFell	Irsay's $29K
Greg Jennings	Gallifrey Time Lords
Roddy White	@Coltscanada
Michael Floyd	Carolina Shoecocks
C.J. Spiller	Team BNTC

K

Player	Team
Mason Crosby	Statistical Anomaly
Phil Dawson	Conceit
Stephen Hauschka	Ohio Thunder Badgers
Brandon McManus	Good on Paper
Cody Parkey	Apocalypse Horsemen
Cairo Santos	(Insert Witty Name)
Caleb Sturgis	Ryan's Rad Team
Connor Barth	Irsay's $29K
Adam Vinatieri	Gallifrey Time Lords
Justin Tucker	@Coltscanada
Chandler Catanzaro	Carolina Shoecocks
Stephen Gostkowski	Team BNTC

DEF

Player	Team
Buffalo - DEF	Statistical Anomaly
Baltimore - DEF	Conceit
Jacksonville - DEF	Ohio Thunder Badgers
Houston - DEF	Good on Paper
Detroit - DEF	Apocalypse Horsemen
Los Angeles - DEF	(Insert Witty Name)
Carolina - DEF	Ryan's Rad Team
Denver - DEF	Irsay's $29K
Philadelphia - DEF	Gallifrey Time Lords
Miami - DEF	@Coltscanada
Green Bay - DEF	Carolina Shoecocks
Seattle - DEF	Team BNTC