Dak Dak Dak Goose Gets Victory over Y'all Need Jesus, Notches Third in a Row

Week 5

  • Dak Dak Dak Goose
  • 135.1 pts, 4-1
  • Weekly Grade
  • Y'all Need Jesus
  • 109.75 pts, 0-5
  • Weekly Grade

Dak Dak Dak Goose got the second-highest point total in the league this week on the way to their third consecutive win when they defeated Y'all Need Jesus 135.10 to 109.75. The streak is due in part to Dak Dak Dak Goose having the second-highest scoring output in the league at 130.00 points per matchup. Y'all Need Jesus remains in 12th place with a 0-5 record. Dak Dak Dak Goose is in second place, having now beaten Professor McMurder (118.60 to 97.85) and Kyle's Glorious Team (139.70 to 78.10).

Top Players

    • Deshaun Watson
    • 35.15
    • Leonard Fournette
    • 31.40
    • Jacksonville Jaguars Defense
    • 28.00
    • Jameis Winston
    • 21.80

Smooth Moves by Dak Dak Dak Goose

  • Winning make you feel warm and fuzzy? Coincidentally, Toyota Hall of Fame inductees get a gold jacket that is both warm and quite fuzzy.
  • The second-highest RB score of the week and the seventh-highest RB score of the season came from Leonard Fournette, who scored 31.40 points.
  • Lean, mean, and haunting your dreams. The Jacksonville Jaguars Defense was a terror this week, accounting for 28.00 points. It was the highest DEF score of the week and the third-highest score among DEF in the league this season.
  • With 18.30 points, Devin Funchess, who Dak Dak Dak Goose picked up this week, beat his 11.11-point projection by 64.7%.
  • There are rumors that the military wants to model a new all-terrain vehicle based off of Le'Veon Bell. He had the fifth-highest score among RBs in the league this week with 19.30 points.

Toyota Roster Tune-up

  • Losing leave you feeling defeated? Set your sights on something better than winning: the Toyota Hall of Fame.
  • Y'all Need Jesus left the 12.40 points scored by J.J. Nelson on the bench this week. He beat his projected point total by 80.8%, the 10th-highest percentage in the league.
  • With 2.80 points, Carlos Hyde was last on the team in scoring and got only 19.6% of his 14.25 projected points, his lowest percentage of the season.
  • After a season-low 9.90 points against a projected 19.65, Mike Evans has scored below his projection in three straight games.
  • Gotta hit rock button before you can start to rise. It was a season-low 4.40 points for Ameer Abdullah this week. It was also a season-low for his performance versus projections, reaching only 34.4% of a projected point total of 12.79.

What If

  • If Dak Dak Dak Goose played Y'all Need Jesus every week, they'd be 4-1 this year.
  • Dak Dak Dak Goose would have beaten nine other teams besides Y'all Need Jesus this week.
  • Dak Dak Dak Goose would be 2-2 if they played the same schedule as Y'all Need Jesus.
  • Dak Dak Dak Goose would be 40-15 if they played every team every week.
  • Besides Dak Dak Dak Goose, Y'all Need Jesus would have been defeated by seven other teams this week.
  • And they say procrastination doesn't pay off! Had they played each other last week, Dak Dak Dak Goose would have lost to Y'all Need Jesus 148.35 - 139.70.
  • Y'all Need Jesus would be 2-2 if they played the same schedule as Dak Dak Dak Goose.
  • Y'all Need Jesus would be 19-36 if they played every team every week.

Game Notes

  • Three of the five losses for Y'all Need Jesus this season have come when their opponent scores higher than their season average.
  • Abe Lincoln once said, "You cannot help people permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves." Somebody tell Deshaun Watson that. His 35.15 points led the league and was the eighth-most points scored this season, but Y'all Need Jesus could not get the win.
  • Hey, I'm sure Dak Dak Dak Goose appreciates the tough competition. In the loss, Y'all Need Jesus had the eighth-highest losing score in the league this season with 109.75 points.
  • We don't condone cheating, but this group of wide receivers might want to spray Stickum on their gloves. The 21.00 total points by the WRs on Y'all Need Jesus was their lowest WR output this season.
  • Dak Dak Dak Goose got a combined 50.70 points from their RBs, the highest combined scoring output from the RB position for any team this week.
  • Dak Dak Dak Goose has now won three games in a row.
  • With 109.75 points, Y'all Need Jesus ranked ninth in the league in scoring this week.
  • Dak Dak Dak Goose outdid their projection in the win, while Y'all Need Jesus came in under their point expectation. Dak Dak Dak Goose is now 3-0 when overachieving, while Y'all Need Jesus falls to 0-4 when failing to reach their projection.
Dak Dak Dak Goose
Y'all Need Jesus
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  • Top Players by Points
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