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QB

Player	Team
Jared Goff	Dunderdummy
Dak Prescott	red's team
Russell Wilson	The Gang Green
Jameis Winston	Perdido
Cam Newton	Harvey Wallbangers
Ben Roethlisberger	Dinah-Moe Humm
Carson Wentz	We suck again
Matt Ryan	Old Hippies

WR

Player	Team
Antonio Brown	Dunderdummy
Davante Adams	red's team
DeAndre Hopkins	The Gang Green
Julio Jones	Perdido
Doug Baldwin	Harvey Wallbangers
Tyreek Hill	Dinah-Moe Humm
Michael Thomas	We suck again
Mike Evans	Old Hippies

WR

Player	Team
A.J. Green	Dunderdummy
Dez Bryant	red's team
Golden Tate	The Gang Green
Brandin Cooks	Perdido
Larry Fitzgerald	Harvey Wallbangers
JuJu Smith-Schuster	Dinah-Moe Humm
Stefon Diggs	We suck again
Keenan Allen	Old Hippies

RB

Player	Team
Dion Lewis	Dunderdummy
Todd Gurley	red's team
LeSean McCoy	The Gang Green
Leonard Fournette	Perdido
Kareem Hunt	Harvey Wallbangers
Alvin Kamara	Dinah-Moe Humm
Mark Ingram II	We suck again
Duke Johnson	Old Hippies

RB

Player	Team
Jordan Howard	Dunderdummy
Melvin Gordon III	red's team
Ezekiel Elliott	The Gang Green
Christian McCaffrey	Perdido
Kenyan Drake	Harvey Wallbangers
Le'Veon Bell	Dinah-Moe Humm
Devonta Freeman	We suck again
Alex Collins	Old Hippies

TE

Player	Team
Cameron Brate	Dunderdummy
Jared Cook	red's team
Austin Hooper	The Gang Green
Rob Gronkowski	Perdido
Zach Ertz	Harvey Wallbangers
Travis Kelce	Dinah-Moe Humm
Delanie Walker	We suck again
Evan Engram	Old Hippies

Q/W/R/T

Player	Team
Kirk Cousins	Dunderdummy
Philip Rivers	red's team
Kyle Rudolph	The Gang Green
Hunter Henry	Perdido
Drew Brees	Harvey Wallbangers
Case Keenum	Dinah-Moe Humm
Marcus Mariota	We suck again
Adam Thielen	Old Hippies

K

Player	Team
Wil Lutz	Dunderdummy
Matt Bryant	red's team
Ryan Succop	The Gang Green
Mason Crosby	Perdido
Chris Boswell	Harvey Wallbangers
Justin Tucker	Dinah-Moe Humm
Stephen Gostkowski	We suck again
Matt Prater	Old Hippies

DEF

Player	Team
Jacksonville - DEF	Dunderdummy
Baltimore - DEF	red's team
New Orleans - DEF	The Gang Green
Denver - DEF	Perdido
Minnesota - DEF	Harvey Wallbangers
Los Angeles - DEF	Dinah-Moe Humm
New England - DEF	We suck again
Philadelphia - DEF	Old Hippies