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  • CSH Fantasy Football '14 (ID# 422767)

    Marvin Berry Brings Down Conna's Penis Hole, Climbs to 10th Place

    Week 9

    • Marvin Berry
    • 3-6
    • Weekly Grade: B
    • 114.98
    • Conna's Penis Hole
    • 3-6
    • Weekly Grade: C+
    • 91.86

    Marvin Berry benefited from 20.08 points from Drew Brees and 20.00 from DeSean Jackson, taking down Conna's Penis Hole 114.98 to 91.86. The manager of Conna's Penis Hole should definitely keep his day job. They only scored 78.2% of their projected points, and has now failed to meet projections for three weeks running. Eli Manning led Conna's Penis Hole with 23.16 points while Eric Decker racked up 16.80. Marvin Berry (3-6, 1,002.10 points) inches up to 10th place and Conna's Penis Hole (3-6, 959.68 points) sinks into 11th place.

    Top Players

      • Eli Manning
      • 23.16
      • Drew Brees
      • 20.08
      • DeSean Jackson
      • 20.00
      • Adam Vinatieri
      • 19.00

    Smooth Moves by Marvin Berry

    • The 19.00 points scored by Adam Vinatieri was the highest K score of the week and is the second-highest K score in the league this season.
    • With 20.00 points, DeSean Jackson ranked seventh in the league in scoring among WRs this week.
    • With 15.20 points, Shane Vereen ranked 10th in scoring among all RBs in the league this week.
    • Apparently playing within themselves was good enough. Marvin Berry won despite having only 5 of their 10 starters exceed their projected points.
    • The 2nd string may be able to contend for the playoffs by themselves. Marvin Berry won with three players on the bench that did not play this week.

    Toyota Roster Tune-up

    • After that performance, we have to wonder if Conna's Penis Hole cares about becoming a Hall Of Famer at all. That's right, you're being judged by an online recap. 
    • Whoever gave you this advice, you might want to lose their number. Picked up and started Shayne Graham, who then scored below his 8.81-point projection with 4.00 points.
    • This is how people lose everything in casinos. Conna's Penis Hole thought their luck would change and went back to the well with Branden Oliver. However, he scored 3.10 points against a projected 13.89 and has now underachieved in three straight games.
    • You wish you had a kicker like ours. Marvin Berry won the K position battle, beating Conna's Penis Hole 19.00 - 4.00.
    • The 2.20 points scored by Andre Johnson was a season-low. He had a projected 14.59-point total, and has now underachieved in three straight games.

    What If

    • Marvin Berry would be 6-3 if they played Conna's Penis Hole every week.
    • Marvin Berry would have beaten seven other teams besides Conna's Penis Hole this week.
    • Had they played each other last week, Marvin Berry would have defeated Conna's Penis Hole 119.64 - 109.28.
    • Marvin Berry would be 2-6 if they played the same schedule as Conna's Penis Hole.
    • If Marvin Berry had played every team in the league each week, they would be 47-52.
    • Besides Marvin Berry, Conna's Penis Hole would have been defeated by eight other teams this week.
    • If they played the same schedule as Marvin Berry, Conna's Penis Hole would be 3-5.
    • If they played every team every week, Conna's Penis Hole would be 40-58-1.

    Game Notes

    • Looks like teams bring their A game when they see them on the schedule. Of the losses Conna's Penis Hole has had, four were against opponents who topped their season scoring average that week.
    • The tragedy of being an underachiever is that Conna's Penis Hole knows what they should be, but reality keeps telling them that they're wrong. They scored 91.86 points against a projected 117.40 and underachieved for the seventh time this season, including the last three weeks in a row.
    • The 114.98 points by Marvin Berry was their lowest winning score of the season.
    • Marvin Berry was able to cover the 2.82-point spread in the win.
    • Just because Robert Horry has seven NBA championship rings, doesn't mean he's one of the greats. Despite being on the winning team, Ben Tate scored 5.20 points against a projected 15.38 and has now underachieved in three straight games.
    • Marvin Berry is now 1-5 when failing to reach their projection and Conna's Penis Hole falls to 2-5 when scoring below their projected total.
    • Conna's Penis Hole scored 91.86 points, ranking them 10th in the league in scoring.
    • The 34.40 points put up by the RBs on Marvin Berry was the second-highest combined score by a team's RBs this week.
    Marvin Berry
    Conna's Penis Hole
    • Points by NFL Position
    • Top Players by Points
    • Game Flow

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    Fantasy MasterpiecesWeek 9

    Nick Foles PHI - QB 2013 vs. Oakland 22–for-28 passing, 406 yards, 7 TD passes, 0 INTs Not to be outdone by Peyton Manning in Week 1 of last season, Foles matched the Bronco signal-caller's NFL record-tying seven TD pass performance in a 49-20 Week 9 rout of the Oakland Raiders.

    The seven TD tosses also contributed to a run of 19 straight touchdown passes by Foles without an interception. Ultimately, he would throw his first pick of the season in the midst of driving snow against Detroit in Week 14, leaving him one scoring throw shy of Peyton Manning's NFL-record of 20.
    Each week of the season we will bring you the top fantasy football performances of the past 10+ years for that week.

    Biggest Blowout

    Week 15 Results Matchup Recap >
    avatar Marvin Berry
    --hidden--
    166.10
    avatar vs. Fuck My Ass
    --hidden--
    112.76
    +53.34
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