The Shit Pumpers Tops Cooch, Ushers Them from First Place

Week 13

  • The Shit Pumpers
  • 8-5
  • Weekly Grade: A+
  • 125.78
  • Cooch
  • 8-5
  • Weekly Grade: B-
  • 101.14

Even though The Shit Pumpers (second place, 8-5, 1,332.90 points) was behind Cooch in the standings entering the week, they aren't behind on the scoreboard this week, knocking Cooch (8-5, 1,253.36 points) from first place after beating them 125.78 to 101.14. They registered the highest point total in the league this week, which is the kind of achievement that might impress their parents but no one else. Even though the teams are tied for second place with matching 8-5 records, The Shit Pumpers has a distinct advantage in points, 1,332.90 to 1,253.36. This win served Cooch a cold dish of revenge after they won a Week 4 matchup, 85.96 to 77.36.

Top Players

    • Cam Newton
    • 37.14
    • Tom Brady
    • 33.78
    • Allen Robinson
    • 33.30
    • Jeremy Maclin
    • 19.50

Smooth Moves by The Shit Pumpers

  • Even NASA would be proud of this aerial performance. Allen Robinson had 33.30 points, the highest WR score of the week and the second-highest WR score in the league this season.
  • The Shit Pumpers saw their third-largest single-week point total by a player this season with Tom Brady scoring 33.78 points. The score was also high enough to rank fifth in the league.
  • What do Apache helicopters, F-117 Nighthawks and Jeremy Maclin have in common? They are all dangerous aerial weapons. He ranked fifth in the league in scoring among WRs this week with 19.50 points.
  • With only 4 of their 9 starters beating their projected points, The Shit Pumpers was still able to win.
  • The Seattle Seahawks Defense exceeded scoring projections by 25.7%, with 10.00 points against a projected 7.96.

Toyota Roster Tune-up

  • You gave it the old college try. Unfortunately for you, this isn't college ball. This is professional football at the national level; you know the acronym.
  • Picked up Doug Baldwin but left him on the bench, where he scored 21.40 points and exceeded his scoring projection by 183.2%, the fourth-highest percentage in the league.
  • Should have started the Minnesota Vikings Defense, which underachieved, but still had more points than the starting DEF with 6.00 against a projected 7.09.
  • Jarvis Landry was last in the matchup in scoring and achieved only 4.6% of his projected point total, his lowest percentage of the season.
  • The 5.00 points scored by Brandon McManus fell short of his 8.48-point projection, the fifth straight game where that has happened.

What If

  • The Shit Pumpers would be 7-6 if they played Cooch every week.
  • The Shit Pumpers would have been undefeated if they played every team in the league this week.
  • Were they resting their players for this week? The Shit Pumpers would have defeated Cooch 112.90 - 91.92 had they played each other last week.
  • The Shit Pumpers would be 7-4 if they played the same schedule as Cooch.
  • If The Shit Pumpers had played every team in the league each week, they would be 74-43.
  • Cooch would have lost to five other teams besides The Shit Pumpers this week.
  • Cooch would be 6-5 if they played the same schedule as The Shit Pumpers.
  • If they played every team every week, Cooch would be 62-55.

Game Notes

  • The Shit Pumpers has had three wins this year where their opponent beat their average score.
  • Maybe the league is colluding against them. All five of the losses for Cooch this season have come when their opponent scores higher than their season average.
  • In the loss, Cam Newton led the league in scoring and had the fourth-most points in the league this season with 37.14.
  • The 125.78 points scored by The Shit Pumpers was the highest in the league this week and the 10th-highest in the league this season.
  • With a combined 62.90 points from their WRs, The Shit Pumpers got their highest combined scoring output from the WR position this season.
  • The WRs on Cooch collectively had their worst week of the season with only 15.30 points.
  • Cooch had their three-game win streak snapped in the loss.
  • With a margin of victory of 24.64 points, The Shit Pumpers had the second-highest margin in the league this week.
The Shit Pumpers
Cooch
  • Points by NFL Position
  • Top Players by Points
  • Game Flow

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Fantasy MasterpiecesWeek 13

Barry Sanders Det - RB 1991 vs. Minnesota 251 total yards, 4 TDs Sanders was one of the most exciting players to watch in NFL history, and the best performance of his Hall of Fame career, the only one that ranks among the 80 best fantasy lines of the past 45 years (13th best overall), is a 4-TD, 251-total yard heyday against Minnesota in Week 13 of ’91.

The 251 yards was the second-best single-game yards from scrimmage total of a career that would end with him as the NFL’s second all-time leading rusher (until Emmitt Smith eventually surpassed both him and then leader Walter Payton).
Each week of the season we will bring you the top fantasy football performances of the past 10+ years for that week.
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